VATS fusion T3-4 and T6-7 post-op

[Slinkeycats]

Originally Posted by jchebert1979

If you have been following my story you know that I have been very frustrated by people not being able to understand the extreme intensity of the levels of pain I was in. Since the pain started it was so severe that I was not able to feel any emotions. I could not feel happy, sad, excited, etc. Only severe pain. This was very different from a depression. I would say that this was more something like depersonalization due to severe pain. I will definitely need to seek counseling of some sort when I return home as I am feeling a flood of emotion that is returning that has been completely foreign to me for two years. While most of it is good, I am experiencing periods of complete rage in the direction of the medical care professionals who ignored the correct diagnosis while I was dying from the pain and losing my home a the possessions that I had worked so hard for. Remember the first MRI two years ago diagnosed everything yet the proper diagnosis was ignored and I was written off.

Well anyway, I think the issues that I am facing and will face in the near future will pale in comparison to what I've made it through. I hope everyone is here is doing the best that they can.

It's so nice to see others on here that are feeling the same way and understand the unimaginable pain 24/7 that thoracic herniation cause. Then add the lack of an ounce if care from doctors and act like you couldn't possibly be in that bad of pain. My one doc has made really stupid comments like "what's the big deal and what's the rush" when I've tried to get in to get a test or a consult for an option of getting out of this pain, or a specialist. The list goes on of built up hope and dashed with cold ignorance. I have been asked if I had something emotional that is making this worse? I asked what could possibly be worse than this 24/7. They said it couldn't possibly hurt that bad. Wanting to run other tests even because they didn't think 3 herniated discs, one with a tear could be causing this kind of pain or they think I'm lying. I would I stand to gain? I've always been an athlete. I used to be a personal trainer at Chicago Health Club. I was on my 6 mile daily run when this intense pain came on and never went away. Took me forever to find out I had the herniations, but I still have fought to get anything done for me. I couldn't have agreed more and sounds like my exact quotes on here by jchebert1979 I even told several docs there's a huge difference from depression and being in so much pain that you fight just to function thru the pain. This is worse than depression, I still want to do all the great athletics and hobbies I did before that day 3 years ago. My mind craves it and dreams of the day it can live without so many pain impulses bombarding it every waking moment and only being able to sleep sitting up leaning lightly against pillow in chair and have to take sleeping pills and pain meds to even stay sleeping for a couple hours. I fight to survive this dying agony that is my body at only 45 very young being an athlete since junior high. Then I fight doctors from playing me like a full and brushing me off. Then I have to defend my pain to those in my life and I just have no energy left for any of it. I only care about getting better and my pets. If I could be 50%, I'd call that a success. Anything more, would be an amazing gift that seems too good to be true at this point. That coming from someone who never thought me of all people would be living through this. I know people in my life don't really get it or understand it, but that's for them to now care enough to step to the plate and research it and gain the knowledge that helps them get it. Because I have to go thru enough with this unlivable pain and with explaining and defending myself to doctors, I have nothing left to give. This is shaking me to the core and changing who I am. I have to remind myself how strong of a woman I am and that I will beat this, but I have my doubts as 3 years have come and gone and its only getting worse. The longer it goes on, the farther away from the life I loved goes away. My insurance is only in Indiana and my only options are in other states. I'm currently checking into those to make sure they except cash patients.
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[Slinkeycats]

I posted a reply to another member's post about understanding their sentiments and misery. I too am dealing with this unbelievable agony and nightmare of a life right now. I am getting nowhere with these docs in Indiana and realize I'm going to have to travel and pay out of pocket to get any help. My insurance is only in Indiana and realizing its pathetic at best. Hopefully one of these docs that do VATS accept cash patients. Thankfully I can manage this. It's not what I had hoped since I pay for insurance, but all I want is my life back. I have always been an athlete and a very strong woman. I have worked out since I was in 7th grade and am now 45. Until this injury, I was always very very young for my age because of working out. I was on my daily 6 mile run when this intense pain came over me and it was all I could do to get home. Thankfully I was about 5 miles into it when this happened. I came home and iced it and put heat on it, did all the exercises I would have had a client do if they came to me with something like this. I used to be a personal trainer at Chicago Health Club. I also went to school for nursing and did most of my clinical s in physical therapy as I had considered switching my major into that field. I am a day trader now so I don't practice my degrees and very thankful right now because there's no way I could be working like this. But having did all the things that should have helped me, I went to a chiropractor, acupuncture, physical therapy, injections, etc, etc, etc. 3 yrs and counting and I'm only getting so much worse and no closer to getting help if I stay local. I have read good and bad on Dr Regan. Are there any other docs that anyone has gone to and had success with? I question having surgery without them doing a discogram or other tests first to figure out exactly which nerves are being pinched and from what location. Has anyone heard of this North American Spine that does this procedure called Thoracic Disc Neural Decompression. I spoke with someone there yesterday and faxed my MRI to them and down loaded my disk to them as well. I have 3 herniated discs and one has a tear in it. The pain is off the charts every single day and night, but I don't have to tell anyone on this site about that. That's refreshing! Because I feel like I spend just as much time trying to defend my pain to people who supposedly care about me because they couldn't possibly understand what I'm going through. I'm going through it and still find it hard to comprehend. How can anyone survive this kind of pain day to day, night to night? It takes a strong person to try to figure out how to channel it and just get through each day without going crazy. This has shaken me to the core and changed who I am. I am not the major outgoing person and caring about everyone around me. My mind can only concentrate on surviving all these pain signals being bombed at it 24/7. There's little room for anything else. I am a clean fanatic and still manage to upkeep my home, but what I used to get done in a day, takes me a week and that's thru tears and with pain meds. I sold my large beautiful home with an inground pool and amazing vacation feel landscaping last summer because trying to upkeep that with this back was brutal. I downsized to a townhouse by the beach to take that outside maintenance off my back, literally. It's tough just standing because the pain is so bad, but I'm not a sit around person and that would end up sending me into depression. I can't sit anyway, because that's so painful if I even lean against a chair and laying on my back, is out of the question. And trying to use my arms in anyway, even them moving when i walk is excruciating. I'm only 110 lbs, yet my upper body feels like its 500 lbs. if anyone can send me a doctors info and experience with them, that'd be much appreciated. I am determined to get my health and my life back one way or another. This is not living. It's merely surviving and this is not a way I can continue to live much longer.

[mmglobal]

Slinky, I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. I too suffer from thoracic spine issues and when it's bad... it's really bad. Also, when it's bad, the episodes are not short... they last for weeks and months. I'm sure I'm not telling you anything.

VATS took thoracic spine surgeons from the days of open thoracotomies (crack your chest open... split the sternum... move organs aside to get to the spine), to a much, much less invasive procedure that does not involve the open thoracotomy.

I am considering surgery in the T7-8 area but VATS is no longer state of the art for the surgery I need. I'm considering XLIF. Dr. Regan is also one of the early adopters of XLIF and has been doing them for years. BTW, when looking at the good and bad stories you read about a doctor, it's not like a tally or score sheet. It's important to consider each case individually and to learn to set aside "outliers" that have unique issues that make their cases less relevant or irrelevant to the decision you have to make.

I've been dealing with my T-Spine since 2009. Even before that, I've discovered that symptoms of mine that I had chalked up to my C-Spine were actually thoracic. I've been through a fairly exhaustive litany of diagnostic procedures that you might want to discuss with me. These have included facet injections, costovertebral joint injections and ablations, intercostal nerve blocks, a thoracic discogram and most recently thoracic epidurals. What has been difficult is that we have gotten some pretty amazing results, but have repeated the successful injections with little or no success for the subsequent procedures.

Call me if you wish... number on the ispine and GPN website contact pages.

Mark

[jsewell]

Slinkeycats,
I am sorry you are in so much pain and i do remember it well when i was in your position. I am one of the bad reviewers of DrRegan , unfortunately. If you would like to speak with me you are welcome to pm me and i will send my phone number.
Mark is your best source of info and he is also in the same boat so i would really suggest working with him.
Judy

[Maria]

I've lived with horrific pain (in the past) that was so limiting and just really turned my world upside down and all around and my head too of course. Over the years (like 30) things seemed to have calmed down re my back pain and while I do have some flare ups that are pretty intense still they're nothing compared to what I used to experience.

I still have lumbar issues (that was the worst for me) have some cervical issues and according to my OSS thoracic issues as well which I've only occasionally experienced and pretty briefly though a few times the pain was so sharp and slicing dagger like it just made me afraid to breathe let alone move. Every time I read about people's thoracic issues I shudder...

More recently in the last 2 years my feet have limited me greatly so I have once again been dealing with a condition that is greatly limiting and depressing as well as a result of pain/limitations/the whole shebang.

All I can say is that I do hope you will get the treatment needed to improve your spine/condition/life. I'm sure talking to Mark and Judy both would be very helpful to you. take care, Maria