runner's surgery blog, L4/5, 2008

[runner]

How's everyone doing?

I rescheduled my surgery for before the end of the year. I wish it was tomorrow but it is not.
I am in severe pain tonight and didn't do anything out of the ordinary today.
I feel like life sucks right now.
I am trying not to dwell on it.
It is hard to do.
If I could dig the disc out with my own fingernails i would do it.
Gross, but that is how i feel.
Otherwise, things are moving along. I saw my brother today as he has moved back closer to where I live and he asked of course if I was pregnant.
I just typically go out of the house, thinking that most people I meet up with probably think I am pregnant. Maybe that is why they are holding doors open for me?
I am sure I have adhesions which kind of makes another abdominal surgery kind of scary but I cannot continue to live in severe pain and taking medications that swell me up and screw with my memory.
That's all....keeping busy researching.

Runner

[Maria]

Hi Runner,
I spent many days in the past thinking of doing the same.. I think the last surgeon did a good job of doing a bad job. Then again my own body has it's own thing it's been doing for years. At this point I wonder how accurate whatever diagnosis made re pain generators would be and if I could truly escape pain surgically and ever be well enough to work again?!!?

I was just looking at wages for RN,MSN,NPs in California and sorely missing the fact that I cannot work and make that kind of salary again let alone just be out in the working world again amongst the world that I once knew and loved (now I'm not so sure as a patient for so many differing body parts).

Sorry to hear you're still in so much pain and I do hope there will be some relief for you so at least you can get out a bit and get some necessary things done. I'm so task oriented that it's a habit to run around and get things done when I have a good day and then of course we all know the kind of day that follows that (or week, weeks...).

take care and thanks for updating us. Hang in there

[runner]

Yeah, Maria, I know what you are talking about.

Not having a good day today.
I took lots of med and still have this nasty pain coming through.
Just saw pain doc and I seem to be doing a lot better with the regimen I am now on but not so good today.

It figures that I would feel like this today, the day AFTER I see the pain doc. Trying to hang in there.
About all I can do.

[runner]

Looks like I am pushing my surgery back further or forward may be the word I am looking for as I try to get ADR.
Still before the end of the year.
Hopefully soon as I am getting real tired of being in pain.