How long were you off work after ADR surgery?

[jessmith07]

I feel so STUPID that out of all the research I 've done and all the pounding and fighting with the insurance company and all of the travel coordinating between here, Paris, Munich, Stroebing, that a very important question never entered my mind,,,how long AFTER the surgery will I be down? This sounds like PRISON to me!!!!!

"What will you be having for dinner, Mademoiselle?

"Oh, I'm on that new Stress Diet...have you heard of it?

"Why NO,,,,,?"

"Well, just bring me anything on the menu,,,then, throw it on the floor, yell at me like it's my fault until I cry, and then I'll have the double chocolate mousse, please. In fact, make it a double. Yes, that's right...A double-double. It's called slow suicide. Learn to recognize the symptoms in your friends."

Only I can't really have it, because I try to stay away from this kind of stuff...

I should probably go, I feel my nightly crying jag coming on...Lord, I'm SUCH A BABY!

[Nairek]

Originally Posted by jessmith07

I feel so STUPID that out of all the research I 've done and all the pounding and fighting with the insurance company and all of the travel coordinating between here, Paris, Munich, Stroebing, that a very important question never entered my mind,,,how long AFTER the surgery will I be down? This sounds like PRISON to me!!!!!

"What will you be having for dinner, Mademoiselle?

"Oh, I'm on that new Stress Diet...have you heard of it?

"Why NO,,,,,?"

"Well, just bring me anything on the menu,,,then, throw it on the floor, yell at me like it's my fault until I cry, and then I'll have the double chocolate mousse, please. In fact, make it a double. Yes, that's right...A double-double. It's called slow suicide. Learn to recognize the symptoms in your friends."

Only I just get to dry-hump this one, because I try so hard to stay away from unhealthy stuff...

I should probably go, I feel my nightly crying jag coming on...Lord, I'm SUCH A BABY!

YOU ARE NOT STUPID AND YOU ARE NOT A BABY! There are a lot of things to think about & consider when it comes to surgery. Sometimes we can't think of every single thing to ask the doctor when it comes to making such a huge decision.

Stress is a real "bittie". I can vouch for that. I stress out over quite a bit. Even over stuff that I have no control over. It doesn't help me though.

I knew going into my surgery that I would be out of work for some time. My doc told me 6 weeks & I looked at him like he was high. Go back to work 6 weeks from ALIF/PLIF fusion?!? I wasn't ready to go back after 6 weeks. It was just too painful. I went back to work F/T after 10 1/2 weeks. I was still dealing with some pain & discomfort but I went back due to being pressured by both of my jobs to go back. Silly me. I went back only to tell them that I was leaving them again permanently in 2 months. That went over REALLY well. Oh well.

Both of my jobs are pretty sedentary but that's tough when you have a fusion, I have to remember to get up every 45-60 minutes which again irks the crap out of my supervisor. Evil woman she is.

You have to remember that each person heals differently. Some faster than others. Keep in mind that this is a huge surgery. You want to make sure that you heal properly so you can hopefully avoid doing any damage.

I knew I would be out for some time. I purchased a mortgage disability policy through my insurance company to help with the bills in anticipation of this. I'm not sure if this is an option for you, but it may help relieve some of the stress with paying some bills. I also noticed from your signature that you have some little ones. Is there anyone that can help you with childcare while you are recovering? Again, this may help relieve some stress for you.

I know it doesn't seem like it now, but everything will be OK. If you need to talk, or vent, just hit us up here on the board.

K

[steve55]

I was able to work my desk job at 4-5 weeks out after my 3 level cervical ADR but only for 3-4 hours a day. I'm now 9 weeks out and I'm working 6 hours a day but on many days, the last 2-3 hours are with moderate pain unless I take alleve and maybe a pain killer. Overall , working past 4 hours now usually starts to hurt but I can work through it usually. Dr fenk meyer didn't seem concerned that I'm back to work with some pain, so hopefully I'm not risking messing anything up by doing so. She said you will heal with or without pain and not to worry about it. Again, my pain level at work is slight to moderate. If it gets worse than that I just go home early.

[jessmith07]

I'm sorry for the middle of the night crazy post...even with sleeping pills, I can't sleep, I'm so stressed out.

I took a sleeping pill around 9:00 last night, because the night before, I didn't fall asleep until 3:30 am and had to wake up at 5:30 for work. I woke up at 12:30 and couldn't fall back to sleep...so I finished a book, drank a glass of wine, and jumped on the computer. And started STRESSING! And looking back at my post, and my newly created signature, I can see some fatigue and loopiness too I'll fix that...

Our children are older - 9 to 17 - so childcare isn't a problem, thank the Lord, and they're GREAT kids, so other than occasional bickering, behavior isn't a problem, either. I'm just so scared. Really, that's what it all boils down to...I'm just SO scared.

[Katie]

Jess, if you weren't scared, you'd be nuts

And you have no idea how many 'middle of the night' messages I've written but deleted before sending them Just writing them down helps enormously.

One of my frustrations is that my typing skills are going downhill so rapidly. I usually don't make many mistakes, but lately every third word is misspelled. And being a stickler for punctuation and spelling doesn't help At least I'm catching them. When I stop doing that, I'm really in trouble!

Please feel free to come here and vent any time. It's what we're here for. I'm hoping/scared silly to be getting surgery sometime soon. We can exchange numbers and call each other at 3 am and commiserate

All the best. And did I get this right....seven kids AND a full time job???? You already are Superwoman!

[jessmith07]

Thanks Katie...and yes, I work full-time and have 7 kids; 6 daughters and 1 son. 4 live with us full-time (my three and my husband's son) and his 3 daughters live with us Thursday-Sunday.

I just recently altered my hours to work from 7-3 instead of 9-5 so that I could be home more in the afternoons. Now, I get to pick them up from school, and cook dinner a little more often...and play taxi driver a little more often, too, but it's not so bad.

Funny you mention the typing thing...I've noticed that in the past few weeks, too, but never made the connection that it could be a neuro symptom...Mine seems to be mostly hitting the right keys in the wrong order or "fat fingering" between two keys, and I've also been reversing letters a lot lately, or hitting the same key too many times...It is EXTREMELY frustrating!!

My poor husband...he just doesn't understand. He keeps smiling and telling me it's going to be fine. He's a seasoned traveler, and even lived in Germany for 3+ years when he was in the Army. He keeps telling me not to worry, we're going to be in a nice hotel and the people are great, and it's so pretty there, blah, blah, blah...

I finally snapped and said, "I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE PEOPLE OR THE HOTEL OR THE WEATHER!!! ALL I CARE ABOUT ARE THE SKILLS OF THIS SURGEON!!!" He just doesn't GET it that I walk around trembling all the time, and that I'm so afraid of HAVING the surgery and NOT having the surgery, and that I'm looking for any excuse to chicken out. I'm SO TIRED of being in pain, and that I'm about to submit my body for something that's going to do what? CAUSE MORE PAIN before it gets better...IF it gets better...the last surgery was supposed to make it better but it didn't.

Lord, I'm sitting at my desk, and I'm about to start crying, and I think my fingers are going numb...I hope it's my imagination...

Gotta run...I'll check in around 2:30 in the morning...

[Katie]

Oh Jess, hang in there. We seem to be so much alike....clumsy fingers and all

I really relate to the see-saw of emotions...I have been fighting so hard for surgery for the past year and a half, and now I am terrified as well. I normally don't worry about 'things' until they are right on my doorstep, but this is creeping up on me fast. Like you, I'm really worried about the post-surgery pain...big time. Worried that it is going to be worse than what I'm experiencing now. With medication, I can control it now. But in a hospital, at night, at the mercy of nurses who may or may not give me the correct dose ON TIME before it gets out of control....well, that is another thing altogether.

Do you notice that I'm worried about control issues?

Jess, I think you should send your dear husband to the 'caregivers' forum He may gain some insight there once it gets rolling!

[treefrog]

Jess, just because your last surgery wasn't all that you were hoping for, does not mean the same thing will happen this time. Obviously the laminectomy did not address everything that was going on, and that's unfortunate. I have great faith that Dr. Bertagnoli will do the best surgery for you, and me, and that we will be feeling so much better in no time. He is the worlds best surgeon for ADR surgery, I trust him completely.

Since you have been able to keep working through this, you are more likely to have a better outcome (according to a research article I read), than someone who is no longer able to work before surgery. This, and the fact that Dr. B. has done thousands of these surgeries gives me hope. As I think they are the most important factors to a good outcome.

Have you talked to your doctor about your anxiety and stress? Maybe they can give you something to help with that.

I have been having some short bouts of anxiety, but so far they haven't lasted longer than a few hours. There are things that are beyond my control, and I will try to do whatever I can to make sure things get done in time. But if they don't, they don't and hopefully there will be a way to work around it.

I guess I am lazy at heart, because I am looking forward to not working for a couple of months. Although I am afraid I won't have the discipline to walk every day, or push myself to walk further each day. But I hope that I will, and that I will want to come back to work at some point.

The most frightening thing for me, is thinking about the post-op pain. I am so worried they won't have my pain controlled adequately, or that the meds they give me will make me nauseated, or both. And the next most frightening thing is the pain and discomfort I may have on such long flights, both going over and coming back. I don't like pain, and will do everything in my power not to hurt myself, so you can imagine how much I want this surgery to work.

Have you talked to your employer yet, about the likelihood that you will be out longer than you expected? Maybe they will surprise you with their understanding. At least I hope that talking with them, will ease your mind about it.

[dshobbies]

hey Jess,

Been there, done that. The 'crazies' occur when living with pain and/or before any surgery but for spine surgery, it's double. You have hopes and dreams but there's a very possible downside. Making an informed decision means knowing that a negative outcome is, although not probable, possible. Some perfect candidates have seemingly negative results and other's, who have some history not in their favor, go on to live happily ever after. Some are in the middle.

There's also something that happens in the middle of the night, when all is quiet and everyone else is happily snoring away and you're prowling the dark, empty halls. The nervous tension that you experience all the time migrates out of your body and into the walls and floors. There, it grows and mutates into an abnormal psychosis, technically referred to as the ultra-crazies, which can then be transmitted back into your body, transdermally through osmosis. Ask Justin, he's a doctor and this is a medical fact . There are several aspects to this phenomenon; depression, paralyzing fear, thinking adnormalities, concern for your future and that of your family and of course, the hatred of the more normal world.

Jess do you remember the first time you were pregnant? Was there anything you didn't think/worry about? Didn't any blip/symptom send you into a blithering idiot where you imagined the worst and beyond? That's exactly what's happening now. Having a baby, though the vast majority are born without any medical fanfare, has it's complications. But that didn't stop you. And though you still worry constantly about your children, the chances of them growing up and the cycle repeating are pretty good.

I'm not trying to liken children to your back, just to similarities to the crazies. I'm 3 1/2 years post op and any twinge still sends my imagination into the cosmos. That's who we are and will always be. Your husband doesn't understand because he hasn't experienced either pregnancy or living with pain. He wants to comfort you but has no idea what you're going through. Of course he's saying 'there, there now. Everything will be okay' because that's what we all say.

You are entitled to your feelings, whatever they are. Don't worry about what others think. If the c's or uc's overtake you, so be it. It is what it is. You have enough to worry about. I know it's hard, but try to smile. It does lift the spirit, however temporarily.

Dale